That's what I said to myself on Saturday morning, as I set on the steps of Northeastern Middle School, breathing heavily, a veritable river of sweat running down the steps and into the parking lot below. I don't mean to complain in saying that, but it's just a fact for me right now. Nothing about running is enjoyable for me these days.
Two miles, a distance that used to be extremely easy for me, is a struggle. I probably can't run a 5K right now and I feel like I'm a few weeks away from being there. The half marathon I'm signed up for in October is probably a stretch physically, anyway, but mentally, it just seems completely outside the realm of the possible.
More troubling, is that I just don't want to run more than two miles right now. I mean, why would I? It's hot, it's humid, and it's hard; just not enjoyable in any sense of the word right now. Really, I probably can -- and should -- try to push myself up toward 3 miles this coming weekend to get a better read on my compartment syndrome symptoms. I'll definitely need a change of scenery for it (rail trail, maybe?) because I definitely am feeling bad vibes about just running it in the neighborhood where I usually run, where I limped back to my car so many times last year and earlier this one.
Again, I don't mean to complain, but I'm not sure how I fix the mental/motivational aspect of this. I think I just need to accept that until I get some more conditioning back and the weather cools down, that this is going to be miserable. It's just harder than usual to see the big picture when I really haven't had a really good, enjoyable, or rewarding run since the first half of last year. Today's run wasn't as miserable as Saturday's, except for the part where I tripped on uneven sidewalk and went flying. That kind of sucked.
Meanwhile, I'll be out there on the road on Wednesday or Thursday morning, hating every second of it.
Two miles, a distance that used to be extremely easy for me, is a struggle. I probably can't run a 5K right now and I feel like I'm a few weeks away from being there. The half marathon I'm signed up for in October is probably a stretch physically, anyway, but mentally, it just seems completely outside the realm of the possible.
More troubling, is that I just don't want to run more than two miles right now. I mean, why would I? It's hot, it's humid, and it's hard; just not enjoyable in any sense of the word right now. Really, I probably can -- and should -- try to push myself up toward 3 miles this coming weekend to get a better read on my compartment syndrome symptoms. I'll definitely need a change of scenery for it (rail trail, maybe?) because I definitely am feeling bad vibes about just running it in the neighborhood where I usually run, where I limped back to my car so many times last year and earlier this one.
Again, I don't mean to complain, but I'm not sure how I fix the mental/motivational aspect of this. I think I just need to accept that until I get some more conditioning back and the weather cools down, that this is going to be miserable. It's just harder than usual to see the big picture when I really haven't had a really good, enjoyable, or rewarding run since the first half of last year. Today's run wasn't as miserable as Saturday's, except for the part where I tripped on uneven sidewalk and went flying. That kind of sucked.
Meanwhile, I'll be out there on the road on Wednesday or Thursday morning, hating every second of it.
I wish I had an easy fix for you here - but I don't. I haven't been out much, at all . . . right at the 5k mark, over the weekend, I puked (I went out at midday with nothing in my stomach but a whole lot of water . . . not the wisest of decisions).
ReplyDeleteGaining strength & increasing distance is easy - just run more . . . but wanting to run, well, that's a whole 'nother issue. Yeah, look for a change of scenery - I actually use the Newville/Shippensburg Rail-Trail as my "need new scenery" strategy...something about mostly flat with pretty sights just works to clear my head a bit.
Thanks, John. I think the only cure is just for me to hang in there until I start having some runs that don't suck, meaning I get a little more positive reinforcement from them.
DeleteIntellectually, I know I have to struggle through low-mileage runs again, but I need to change my mindset to enjoy them or at least appreciate them a little more.
Ditch the watch.
ReplyDelete